[3 under five]
cheap-ass eats
1. the classico
-slice and a pop
-pizzaville
-used to be 3 bucks for decade, straight. unfortunately, they inflated the deal by a half a dollar more. still good though.
2. the rasta
-2 patties on a cocobun + a pineapple pop for 3 something
-nicey`s
-ive been eating patties since i can remember
-jamaicans love me; i know they love me.
3. the arab
-falafel and a pepsi
-4 bones
- mediterranian place at york U (im bad with names)
- well prepped and you get your own "regular" if they like you after a while


"under 5 bucks?! get the hell outta here! you hear me? mohammed-ahmed-atef says fuck off! YOU MOTHERFALAFEL!!
hahahhhahahahhahaHALAL"
*it`s all in good humour, believe me i have many the arab friend*

[and i keep telling myself that i hate refined carbohydrates.
damn you gluten, youre my worst enemy...but youre so kind to my wallet.]






[the article blineguy wanted me to write (chinese pastries and what not)]
i have this deep love affair with the chinese egg tart. i can`t exactly pinpoint where it started as a childbut thanks to my parents or anyone else who`s been shoving those down my throat to this day, thank you for making me a strung-out fiend. within this text i won`t focus on how sweet and tasty that custard filling is or how i enjoy the flaky shells of that pastry and how they just melt in my mouth while i not only masticate but enjoy those God-sent, heavenly chinese delicacies everso gradually, savouring every second, every moment every interval of papillae stimulation - naw, i won`t talk about that. i`ll talk about everything else chinese pastries encompass on the macro-scale.
lets start with my friends at skool. the vast amount of chinese ones - they always seem to have an extra eggtart for me. i dunno if they have an easybake oven fired up under their lecture hall seat or if theyve beenstudying david copperfield`s magic but shoot,they really know how to implement an eggtart as an instrument of diversion on me. it`s like they`ve been watching one of those fosterparent a child from an underdeveloped country commercial where im the child and the spokesperson speaks in the background and exclaims, "for only 1 eggtart a month, you too can support this grown man in all of life`s endeavours so he, too, can one day blossom into something great and extraordinary". *camera zooms into my big ass teary eyes and fades out while heart-wrenching music plays*.
know what im sayin?
anyhow as for chinese pastries, think bout what your favourite is? is it the bbq pork bun with its baked goodness and sweetmeat filling..all red and attractive in colour? maybe you like flashing lights and fireworks, in that case, the corn, ham and mayo bun might be your thang. or maybe its the sesame ball..with the bean filling. those are pretty good too. or how bout the deep fried blackbean bun with the sugar coating - really bad for you but really good to ya. maybe your life requires that "tropical" flare and you need a coconut bun. maybe youre urban and very "street", in that case youd want the hotdog bun.
wanna talk locale?

well i`ve heard quite the amount of anectdotal evidence surrounding this area. chinese dude at work said "jay, you haven`t tried an eggtart till youve had a dim sum egg tart. well, hey, there`s one type i look forward to checking in the near future. blineguy, the imbicile who suggested i write about all of this says this little pastry shop on creditview has the best ones. there, they always mistaken him for being chinese. they talk to him in chinese and even give him hookups. i should check that out too (i doubt theyll think im chinese though. crap). big land farms on burnhamthorpe has a pretty good deal on my tarts goin at 2 for a buck - i can`t complain withthat now can i? then again, on hwy10, happy cake pastry shop has `em for 60cents each. however, although convenient to me, i feel the size of their tarts are kinda small and the shell itself could be better. then again, i shouldnt and cant knock them, moms always cops our pastries from them so disrespect and destructive criticism in this case is kinda wrong - ma bad. maybe it`s chinatown toronto along spadina...could be pac mall - but then again, last time i checked there, they didn`t even have anymore tarts left at their shop. bastards. whatever you like and wherever you like `em, im sure we all have our stories and preferences. one last thing, did i ever mention that i like eggtarts???....??? don`t think i did.